The age-old question of whether Therapy works or not always seems to surface when someone mentions they have issues they want to work through. For these five people, therapy was a massive success.
It’s no secret that therapy is expensive and often takes a long time to start working. Shrouded in stigma, it is also an extremely intimidating route to take when struggling with one’s mental health.
However, more and more people are opening up about their experiences and successes with therapy. A recent Reddit thread saw many people step forward to share the best advice their therapist gave them. Here are some we felt we could all learn something from:
1. Irrational Issues Can’t Have Rational Solutions
“I exhausted myself trying to fix my failed relationship by trying to fix my ex’s mental illnesses by myself. Those problems were not mine to fix, and even if they were, I did not have the tools to do it.”—InfernalWedgie
She went on to explain that the best advice her therapist gave her was that if a problem seems irrational no rational solution will work so stop trying to fix it. She learned to focus on herself instead.
2. No One Else Is Thinking That
Saint Lux revealed that their therapist told them to “remember that no one thinks about you as much as you think about you.” They went on to explain that this was in response to an issue that plagued them for years, writing:
“Often I tell myself that the world is out to get me or that people don’t like me. But really, that’s not the case. People are far more focused on themselves. A lot of what you feel and worry about is just in your head.”
3. Your Current Situation Doesn’t Define You As A Person
“I’m depressed and angry today, but I am not a weak person. My car and house is dirty right now, but I am not a lazy person. It has become my life mantra and has helped me let go of a lot of the judgement I, and others, place on myself.”—mkhermanski
Their therapist had a very simple solution to the problem. They advised Mkhermanski to remember that “where I’m at right now is not who I am.”
4. Your Past Mistakes Do Not Define Your Current Self
It’s common knowledge that we all make mistakes. However, sometimes you need a little reminder to be kind to yourself.
“There were things you did or said that you might not be proud of but if those things were due to a lack of knowledge, insight, or experience at the time, you might want to consider the fact that as long as you’ve learned from them, you’ve genuinely repented, and your conduct is consciously better going forward, you’re probably not nearly as horrible of a person as you think you are.”—WifeKitty
5. Boundaries Are Important
Finally, the last important piece of advice was given to someone who needed to learn to draw boundaries in their life. No one has the right to have unlimited access to you.
“You are nobody’s emotional tampon. You are not obligated to help anyone. People do not get to trick you into being their therapist. People do not get to dump their problems on you without thinking of the affect it will have on you. You are allowed to say ‘no’ to anyone and everyone, and they will just have to deal with it.”—queen_of_queans