A Guide To Confidently Saying What You Feel

Feb 01, 2021
06:04 A.M.
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Communication is key, but it's not always easy to openly express yourself in certain situations. Here's how you can learn to speak your mind confidently.


Several reasons can make communicating a challenge. Conflict phobia, expecting others to read your mind, emotional perfectionism, or low self-esteem, among many other reasons.

Either way, withholding your thoughts and feelings can leave you feeling stifled at work or in your relationships, even when you aren't thinking about it. Learning to express yourself confidently can improve your overall well-being.

Get To Know Yourself

Photo by Clem Onojeghuo on Unsplash

Photo by Clem Onojeghuo on Unsplash


“With gradual self-disclosure other people will start to open up to you as well, and you can get to this place where you have more authentic relationships and connections.”

consultant psychologist Honey Langcaster-James explains to "Stylish."

Sometimes you're not expressing you're struggling to know yourself. This is essential to building your confidence. You are unique, and so is your voice.

Stop Saying “I’m fine”

Photo by Alexis Brown on Unsplash

Photo by Alexis Brown on Unsplash

We've all done it at some point. Not being 'fine' yet still answering with the dismissive and vague term. Get into the habit of saying when things are not fine.


If you are struggling with something at work or personally, even if it seems small, express your feelings. Say you would like help with a task or that you're not feeling well.

Start Small

Photo by Christin Hume on Unsplash

Photo by Christin Hume on Unsplash

If you're feeling intimidated, start small. Practice the skill in conversation with friends and build confidence in saying what's on your mind and in your heart. Step by step, you can learn to get yourself out of the backseat.


Acknowledge that it may not be easy, but your thoughts are valid. You may be met with resistance, but "Medium" highlights that you need an open mind to express yourself confidently.

Ask Questions

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

Sometimes it feels like other people's apprehension to speak can make it difficult for us to open up in turn. Asking questions may help create a conducive environment for communication.

“When people feel like they’re being heard, it helps us be more confident in our communication. We recognize that we’re being received.”

Psychotherapist and author Emily Roberts tells "Well + Good."

Remember You're Allowed To Be You

There are many different ways to express yourself. Humor, art, wardrobe, fashion, writing, gardening, and so many other things!

Find your niche where you feel like you can be you without judgment, and you may start to build yourself and your confidence from there.

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