A Guide To Reconnecting With Old Friends

May 01, 2021
10:00 A.M.
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Have you ever scrolled your socials only to realize the last time you had a conversation with a friend you were once close with was more than a year ago? Sure it may feel like leaving the odd comment or like on their updates is sufficient, but the truth is the connection is now superficial.


Losing touch with friends isn’t entirely unheard of. It’s wild to think of how quickly life gets in the way. Starting families, moving towns, starting a new job, or gaining a new bunch of friends is an inevitable progression.

If you find yourself wanting to reach out, there’s no need to fall into a rut of embarrassment. Often thinking your friend may not want to talk to you could be the obstacle to an incredible friendship. Enough chat; scroll below for the ultimate guide on how to go about reconnecting with an old friend.

Send a Text Instead of An Email

Photo by Adem AY on Unsplash

Photo by Adem AY on Unsplash


Initiate the conversation. If you have their number, this is as simple as sending a text. You want to keep it short and sweet. Think of texting hi and say you’ve been thinking about them. Do not apologize for the words I’m sorry sets a negative mood. Instead, add that life got in the way, and you would love to see them.

This brings us to our next point. Once the conversation is going, do not doom yourself with an abstract ‘let’s meet for coffee.’ We all know this is speak for let’s meet a year. It can feel disingenuous. Request a meet-up but follow it up with an actual date and time. Meeting up in person will forge deeper connections.

Make Them Laugh

Photo by tabitha turner on Unsplash

Photo by tabitha turner on Unsplash


We live our lives online, so it would be backward to say you cannot continue your friendship online. When online, tag or send them a funny meme. Doing so will foster good relations as you will both feel happier after every interaction.

However, do not stop here. A long-lost friend can make you laugh, therefore do not be afraid to make them laugh. It’s effortless to continue where you both left off, so send them messages about something that made you both laugh. Doing so can feel more personal as they will send you something back.

Address Any Serious Issues

Photo by Omar Lopez on Unsplash

Photo by Omar Lopez on Unsplash


There is a difference between losing a friend and losing touch with a friend. The former is more personal and wrought with emotion. However, it is possible to rekindle this relationship. Once you meet up, do not be afraid to discuss serious issues.

There is no need to sweep conflict under the rug. Besides, it will only harbor feelings of resentment, and you might not get off on the wrong foot. Remember to be direct as possible and do not fear. You can have this conversation in a kind and thoughtful manner. Take away all judgment. It’s time to move on for the better.

Consider What Has Changed

Photo by Gemma Chua-Tran on Unsplash

Photo by Gemma Chua-Tran on Unsplash


It would be a reach to hope for your friendship to remains the same. Life happens, and you might both be in different places than when you once forged your friendship. When reconnecting with an old friend, you want to keep an open mind.

Do not have any other expectations than to have a joyful reunion. However, you may find that your friend may have evolved into someone else. You have to and accept that. It might be awkward at first, or it might be a welcome change. In other cases, you might find that the people you are now might not be compatible, and that’s okay. Give your evolved relationship the grace to be so.

Recapturing the Trust You Built

Photo by Jed Villejo on Unsplash

Photo by Jed Villejo on Unsplash


Be open and discuss what you have been up to since time passed. Furthermore, adding in a dash of drama from stories of your lived experiences will drum up trust. Allow your friend to do the same too.

If they have any good news, cheer for them and encourage them, and they will do the same for you and vice versa. It’s much easier to build the trust you once shared by being open. As a result, your connection will be instantly deeper.

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