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A Guide To Turning A Situationship Into A Relationship

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May 15, 2021
01:00 A.M.

Situationships can be great when you haven't settled in your life yet or if you and your counterpart want to keep things casual.

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Defining a situationship isn't always cut and dry, but it's widely understood as a relationship that's more than 'friends with benefits.' You might be acting like a couple but not technically referring to each other as boyfriend/girlfriend/partner. Some people may refer to it as an "emotional booty call." Situationships have become increasingly popular lately during these uncertain times. Many people don't want to be alone, but they may be reluctant to commit because of the general uncertainty of the time.

Being in a situationship is not inherently a "bad" or "good" thing. In fact, if it's an arrangement that works for you and your partner (or your "kind-of-partner"), it might give you time to get to know each other sans pressure. However, there may come a time when you might want to change the parameters of your relationship. Here's a guide on how you can move from situationship to relationship.

Spend Time Together

Photo by The Creative Exchange on Unsplash

Photo by The Creative Exchange on Unsplash

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Change the gears of your relationship. If your relationship has been primarily over text, plan more dates and hang out. Do coffee after work, movies on the weekend, or other bonding activities.

"Texting is a fantastic way to keep in touch, but it can build a false sense of intimacy and attachment if used excessively."

Relationship coach, Keishorne Scott, told "Bustle."

Communication Is Key

Photo by Leonardo Sanches on Unsplash

Photo by Leonardo Sanches on Unsplash

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You probably won't just smoothly slide into a relationship because you changed the pace of your interactions. You and your potential boo should have a conversation about your relationship.

Talk about where you are right now and where you'd like to be as two people who like each other. Make sure that the two of you are on the same page about what's unfolding.

Photo by Shwa Hall on Unsplash

Photo by Shwa Hall on Unsplash

Understand that communication is critical. While the conversation might not magically change everything immediately, it's both the start and the process. With that, ensure that even after intentions have been made clear.

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Be Willing To Accept What May Come

Photo by Gemma Chua-Tran on Unsplash

Photo by Gemma Chua-Tran on Unsplash

Sometimes if you haven't communicated where you and your partner are at as far as understanding your relationship, you might find that they're not willing to take the step. This is the downside of situationships; things are often murky, and if people are not communicating, they leave room for confusion.

Look out for possible signs that your partner is emotionally unavailable for a relationship. Take note of how they talk about the future of your relationship and whether or not they're someone you can rely on.

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Photo by Sinitta Leunen on Unsplash

Photo by Sinitta Leunen on Unsplash

Moreover, if they explicitly say that they don't want to officially date or are ambiguous or dismissive in their response, they may not want anything other than a situationship. In that case, it might be better to let the relationship go.

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