
My Husband Invited His Ex-Wife to His Birthday Because She Was 'Still Family' – He Didn't Expect What I Did Next
October 01, 2026

In November 2021, news of Valerie Bertinelli's separation from her husband of 10 years, Tom Vitale, shocked fans. About a year later, in November 2022, her divorce was finalized.
Reacting to a fan who remarked that she looked sad, the "One Day at a Time" actress said in a TikTok video that she was "having a bad day." The brief exchange happened right after the news broke of her divorce filing.
Valerie, who cited "irreconcilable differences" in her divorce documents, is no stranger to a failed marriage. Before Tom, she was married to musician and songwriter Eddie Van Halen, but their marriage fell apart.

Eddie Van Halen and Valerie Bertinelli at the Hard Rock Café on February 18, 1995 in New York City | Source: Getty Images
Valerie and Eddie's paths crossed at his concert in 1980. Their whirlwind romance culminated in a wedding just eight months after their first meeting.
Their marriage lasted 20 years and produced one son, Wolfgang Van Halen, who followed in his famous father's footsteps. Wolfgang served as the bassist for his father's band from 2007 to 2020.
Valerie and Eddie separated in 2001 and were officially divorced in 2007. In 2020, Eddie died at 65, following a battle with several health issues, including throat and lung cancer.
Back in 2008, Valerie opened up about why her marriage to Eddie fell apart in her memoir "Losing It: And Gaining My Life Back One Pound at a Time."

Valerie Bertinelli and Eddie Van Halen attend the APLA 6th Commitment to Life Concert Benefit at Universal Amphitheater in Universal City, California, on November 18, 1992 | Source: Getty Images
One of her shocking revelations was that she cheated on her ex-husband Eddie four years into their marriage. The television personality said:
"It was a shame, and it was a guilt that I carried with me for a very long time. And I don't like that, so I really wanted to get that out of me."
Both Valerie and Eddie were unfaithful, but that's not the only factor that led to the downfall of their marriage. Drug abuse also rocked their relationship, with Valerie admitting drugs had been part of their union from the beginning.
Although they parted ways, Eddie remained close to Valerie's heart. In January 2021, the actress burst into tears as she opened up about her grief over her ex-husband's death.
After her split from her late husband, Valerie expected to raise Wolfgang alone. But that all changed when Tom Vitale came into her life.
They also clicked together because of their similar heritage.
The TV actress' brother, Patrick, introduced her to Tom in 2004. Tom, who runs a private equity fund, was a divorced father of four children. Valerie met the businessman while she was in the middle of her divorce proceedings from Eddie. The pair bonded over their similar experience with painful divorces.
They also clicked together because of their similar heritage. Valerie's father is Italian, while Tom is of Italian-Sicilian descent. In 2010, after six years of being together, Tom popped the question to Valerie. The actress, head over heels for the businessman, said yes.
Valerie said Tom taught her to love herself despite her imperfections during their marriage. While they have called it quits, the pair have surely come out of their union with lifelong lessons.
On October 6, 2026 — the sixth anniversary of Eddie's passing — Valerie sparked a fresh wave of buzz when she posted a throwback photo of herself and her late ex-husband riding in a car together, captioning it, "Photos may fade, like old photos do, but not the memories and never the love."
The tribute drew both an outpouring of support and a wave of criticism from commenters who questioned her continued fondness for Eddie.
One commenter wrote, “It's weird you hold on to EDDIE, as if you two were a couple in the end. It's just weird always talking about him as if he's your identity ....STOP being that EX. You two seperated in 2001. He moved on and remarried in 2009."
Another commenter appeared confused by the criticism, writing, "Oh I'm confused... Wasn't Eddie Van Halen married to Janie Liszewski for several years until his passing in 2020? 😌"
Others focused on the happier memory captured in Valerie's post, "This is the best photo ever..Captures so much laughter ❤️"
But Valerie did not leave the criticism unanswered. Hours later, Valerie returned to Instagram with a lengthy video response directed at the "haters."
She described the negative comments she receives as a form of "coercive control," explaining that critics never say outright that she cannot love her late ex-husband, but instead berate her relentlessly until she backs down. "You can't tell me how I feel," she said defiantly. "I love Ed. Never stopped loving Ed."

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