We all want to be in a happy relationship living in this world, and we definitely need some companionship! But just because we don’t want to be alone doesn’t mean we should settle for a relationship!
Life gets lonely, and it’s nice to come home to someone at the end of a long and hard day. But when you’ve been in a relationship for such a long time, things can get comfortable.
That might make it difficult for you to realize that all you’re doing is settling because you’re unhappy. Here are ten signs that you’re settling in your relationship.
1. Never Revealing The Bad Stuff
When you’re talking to people about your relationship, you want them to be supportive of the relationship. But the people you love want what’s best for you, so they’ll definitely be more critical of the people you bring around.
And when you know that the person you’re with isn’t good enough for you, you’ll want to only talk about how great they are to your friends. That might mean concealing your partner’s faults, so people don’t have anything bad to say about them!
2. They’re Unreliable
If your partner is making promises without following through, it’s going to leave you disappointed. You definitely need someone to depend on in a relationship, and they should be able to meet your needs.
If you’re not getting reliability from your partner, then you’re definitely settling! You can’t have a successful relationship with someone you can’t depend on!
3. Accepting The Bare Minimum
Sometimes you get so caught up in a relationship that you start accepting the bare minimum requirements as if they’re major accomplishments. And for many, loyalty in a relationship feels like asking for a lot.
Loyalty is one of the barest minimum requirements in a relationship. If that’s the only thing you’re getting out of your relationship, is it really worth it?
4. Small Things Get To You
We all get angry at some of the things our partners do, no matter how small or insignificant it is. But when the small things get you triggered to the point of infuriation, then there is a problem.
The little things that anger you build up and eventually lead to resenting your partner. So if they’re not making an effort to change, then maybe it’s a sign that you need to move on because it’s only infuriating you!
5. Defending Them
A huge sign to know that you’re settling is defending them by comparing them to someone who can do much worse. You shouldn’t be accepting your partner’s behavior just because your situation could be a lot worse.
You should be happy and fulfilled in your relationship! But just because your partner isn’t abusing you or cheating on you shouldn’t be the only reason you end up staying. Don’t defend their actions, especially if it’s making you unhappy!
6. Hoping For Change
When you find yourself hoping that things will get better and your partner will change, you are settling. You can’t be happy when things aren’t what you want and need in a relationship.
And if your partner isn’t sticking to their promise of trying to help out and at least meet you halfway so that you can be happy, you shouldn’t have to settle! They should be willing to fight for you no matter what it takes!
7. You Don’t Want To Be Alone
If you’re scared of being alone, you’re going to end up settling for a partner that doesn’t meet any of your expectations. You need to be comfortable with the idea that you’ll be okay on your own, it’s a bit of an adjustment to make, but you’ll get used to it and feel better for it!
8. Being Committed To See It Through
Just because you’ve committed to the relationship, you might feel you have to see it through. But you don’t have to spend your time in a relationship you don’t want to be in!
The other person might not be okay with it, but that shouldn’t stop you from doing what’s best for you! Sometimes you have to disappoint other people just to make yourself happy, and that is completely okay!
9. Picking Up Their Slack
When you’re picking up your partners slack in the relationship, it means they’re not meeting your needs. Yes, some days you pick up your partners slack, but they shouldn’t need you to pick up their slack the entire relationship.
10. They’re Not A Part Of Your Future
When you’re thinking of your future, do you see yourself with the person you’re currently with? If not, ask yourself why and whatever the answer may be, you know why you’re settling with this person.
Don’t settle for less than you deserve because there’s plenty of work you need to do in a normal relationship. You really don’t need the extra pressure of settling!
Written By: Dr Saadiqah Hajat