Do you find yourself in denial, or are you constantly second-guessing yourself in your relationship? Maybe you don’t want to let go but when the other person is just not interested in keeping the relationship alive, is it worth the effort?
A healthy relationship is kept Alive by effort on both parts. Unfortunately, when stuck in a one-sided relationship, it can be easy to trick yourself into thinking that what you’re experiencing is normal.
When the balance is thrown off, the situation can quickly turn toxic, or the relationship can become loveless. So how do you know if the light in your relationship is flickering?
How Does The Imbalance Develop?
Based on our upbringing, we develop different styles of communication and attachment. These styles are present in the way we behave when in vulnerable positions like a relationship.
To have a healthy relationship, you and your partner need to have an open communication line to voice your opinions if you feel like particular needs aren’t met. When in that situation, you may feel the need to constantly compromise to make exceptions for your partner because you might not want to question your relationship.
Stress And Other Red Flags
Suppose one person in the relationship goes through a situation that can cause them stress, and then this can set the balance of the relationship. These situations can push your relationship into a space where one partner has to compromise and make up for the lack of intimacy.
But usually, after the stressful situation is resolved, the relationship can go back to normal. But if it doesn’t, other signs can help you figure out the red flags:
1 Constantly Feeling Insecure
If your partner seems particularly uninvested, you begin to doubt their commitment to the relationship. You can prioritize the relationship and make an effort to communicate, spend time together, and offer to help them when they need it. When the effort is not reciprocated, you’ll find yourself questioning if they care at all.
Feeling insecure in a relationship is generally not a great sign, and it can push you to feel like you can’t trust your partner. When you feel this way, it can make you react in ways that cause conflict and further fuel your anxiety about your relationship.
2 Lack Of Communication
You may find that in a relationship with your friend or your partner that a lot of the time, you are the one who feels free to talk about your woes. Maybe they are a good listener, but when you feel like you don’t know your partner very well, this could be an issue.
When you try to force them to open up and talk, they can brush it off, making for unproductive conflict. Even though you want to have better communication with them, you find it hard to open up to them because they never open up.
3 Unfulfilled Interactions
Time spent with loved ones should be energized and fulfilling. If you end up feeling drained, stressed, or dissatisfied after spending time with someone, it is a sign of an unbalanced relationship.
If you experience a lack of deep emotional connection, you’ll end up feeling lonely and empty after spending time together. You might even analyze the time you’ve spent together, worrying if their lack of Engagement means you did something to upset them.
4 You Do All The Work
In many one-sided relationships, one partner does all the work, which means planning trips, dates, dinners, and checking in when you haven’t talked in a while. If it seems that the relationship would end if you stop communicating or making an effort to see them, the relationship is one-sided.
When you bring this up to them, they may not notice what you are talking about, or they agreed to try harder, but their actions don’t match their words. It can leave you feeling like you are being taken advantage of or that they aren’t interested in the relationship enough to make an effort and save it.
Is The Relationship Worth Fighting For?
If your partner is up to making an effort to address the issues causing you to feel like your relationship is one-sided, then maybe your relationship is worth saving.
If you are dealing with trauma from past relationships or their childhood, then it might be more beneficial to consult a couples counselor to guide you moving forward.
If your partner is unwilling to meet you in the middle and put your mind at ease, there is not much change you can do on your own. You can try to forget about your doubt, but if you’re left feeling unfulfilled, then maybe you and your partner aren’t compatible, and you would be better off moving on.
Dr Saadiqah Hajat